June 11, 1997 - Wednesday

Actually it's 40 min. after midnight on the 10th, well 11th.  Today showed me just not to worry about things.  We went to district meeting and I didn't get any mail.  It's the first week I've never gotten mail.  I was pretty pissed and I had a really bad mood.  Which was really bad because we had a D with Лариса [Larissa].  So I was sitting on the metro and fuming when after praying for God to "take these bad feelings from my heart."  After I prayed I was sitting a couple of seats to my left.  This old couple were sitting across from me and they smiled at the baby.  Well seeing this weathered old Russian man's face brighten up really touched me and I couldn't be mad or depressed anymore.  It's weird how the Lord answers prayers. 

Then while at the D with Лариса, which went really well, I really felt the Spirit and she did too.  It was cool.  She committed again to pray for answers about Joseph Smith and the Book of Mormon.  I explain[ed] why it was important for her to know.  Then she'd know for sure about what we're talking is true.  I think I got her to see a little about how it would help her.



Sister Vera Yagadkina, Nadia Yagadkina, Sveta Borisova & Sasha -
evidently the two girls not too happy with me taking a picture.



Then we came home and sweated in the apartment while eating dinner.  Man it is so humid lately.  So hot.  Getting to the point of where I started about things always working out.  Last night we got told that there would be this New Era thing.  A reporter was coming - we were supposed to set up a FHE.  Well Elder Reagan said to meet the reporters or Ст. Gammon & them in the metro at a little before 7.  The Family Home Evening was to be at 7 over at Ягодкина's [Yagadkina's] house.  Well I worry a lot about it - we were suppose to plan a game and Саша [Sasha] planned a spiritual thought.  So we worried and waited in the metro until about 7:10 and then just decided to go to the place.  So the whole ride to the Ягодкина's I was fuming - dang Gammon etc. because I was afraid the night would flop.  Well we got there at 7:30 - a half an hour late - expecting to have to tell them that the reported hadn't showed.  We even had a game planned and we brought drinks.  So we showed up and 'lo and behold' the reporter and Сты. Gammon & Ludwig are already there with the reporter. 

It turned out all cool and the kids  - Саша [Sasha], Света [Sveta], & Надя [Nadia - hahaha kids - Sveta might have been 16, but Nadia was 19, and Sasha was 18 or 19 as well.  A note about Sveta's name - Svet is light, and if I translated it into English I would call her Lucy???  Lucent - glowing with light, Lucid - shining or glowing, Lucifer (not the best example) - son of the morning etc.  So...the the kids] gave some really good answers to his questions.  It was really cool.  Then after the reporter and the future A.P.s [Assistants to the Presidents - future because we had learned that the mission was going to split on July 1st, and Сты. Gammon & Ludwig were going to be the new president's assistants when he got here.] left we drank the pop and ate this cake Сестра Ягодкина [Sister Yagadkina] made for us.  It was pretty good.  Then we went to the Red Square and hung out with [Ст.] Woolverton and ate at McDonald's and came home late.

[Post-Journal Chat - OK folks do you like how use the brackets[ ] right after the Russian word and give what it sounds like or translates to and sometiems it goes a little long, or would you rather that I did a footnote kind of thing?  or monkeys?]

June 1, 1997 - Sunday

Another week started.  Well we managed to plan this week, at least.  I'm so tired.  Church today was pretty cool.  In the meeting we had some pretty weird testimonies.  I guess it was pretty good.  Then we stayed after for Institute.  Жанна [Zhahna] does a really good job.  She's pretty cute.  She likes to add all these little очка's [ochkas] on the end of stuff.  Like спасибочка [it would be like saying thanx] and shortens all the stuff.  She's really outgoing and has a nice voice.  In Sunday School I was in a regular member class.  This guy named Владимр Кабанов [Vladimur Kabahnov], in was there and in Elders Quorum [I think that I was trying to say "was in there"].  He answered so many questions.  It was cool.  He's in our area plus Олег Гарбус - who used to serve here in Moscow.  Well брат Кабанов plays the piano like a pro. 

[Post journal chat - брат Кабанов playing piano is great because it was always hard to find someone to play the songs in Sacrement Meeting.  In the first branch that I served in, we would play a cd with the songs on it and sing along.  It was never loud enough.

Plus when we missionaries sang by ourselves our tempo was nice and fast and we always sang with gusto.  So from a cd in sacrement meeting that played a lot slower than I was used to...it wasn't the best singing I've ever heard.]

May 20, 1997 - Tuesday

Today was interesting.  We had district meeting which was a lot of bashing against Pres. Jarvis and his new rule about not going above the ring line at all, even on P-Days.  It'll be hard to live that rule.  Then we came home and ate peanut butter sandwiches.  Well we went and picked up some milk and peanut butter at Stockman's [which incidentally right on the ring line]. 

Then I slept for an hour and we went to a беседа [discussion] with Евгенния [Yevgenniya].  We got a Russian lesson and then we went over D&C 89 before leaving at 9:00[pm].  It was a great responsibility to teach and testify and make - mistakes.  At one point I went off on some thing and I stopped at the end of a sentence and asked Ст. Schwartz "where was I going with that."  Then I just testified to her about something.  Well it's time to get a snack and hit the sack.  bye.

[Post-journal chat - Peanut butter is pretty expensive compared to in America - that's why we had to go to Stockman's to buy it.  Stockman's is a pretty big grocery store.  Well when I say pretty big, I mean big for Russia.  Most of their stores are Circle K size places.  Stockman's was two or three Circle Ks put together.  It stocked several American, or European items that you can't get anywhere else.  They have milk from Finland & it comes in 3.5%, 1.5% & .5% in stead of 2%, 1% & Fat Free like here in the US.  The 3.5% makes corn chowder sooooooo goooood.  Very creamy.]

May 4th, Sunday

Man neither Алла or Евгенний [Alla or Yevgenni] came to church today but the meeting was really good.  It was fast and testimony meeting and Сестра Вера [Sister Vera] - "the glue in the bob corner" as Ст. Sefcik likes to say.  Ст. Russel and Pres. Карнеев [Karneyev] bore their testimonies.  It was really good.  So did the "слава тебе" [glory to you] lady.  Then I went off with the young men.  They kept beating each other.  I felt like whacking them also.  Ст. King picked on Влад [Vlad] for a little bit.  That wasn't very cool.

I have a really good idea for an activity from Ст. Gammon.  If everything goes as planned, I will have the young men clean Васили Гарбунов's and  Геннади Тен's [Vasili Garbunov's and Gennadi Ten's] cars for a service project.  In secret, then we will go eat Dunkin' Donuts and hot chocolate.  It should be fun.

[Post journal chat - You know, I don't remember if we actually did anything like this for a service project.  I hope we did - it sounds like fun.  Maybe later in my journal we'll hear about it.  Check out the Location that I saved it on.  When you go close enough, you can see the building we lived in and which end of the building.  Pretty sweet.]

March 17, 1997 - Monday

Ст. Larson just gave me the bird.  (That is so my grandchildren will know about me...whatever).  

Today we helped Larsen more to his new apartment on Prospekt Mira [Let's start with Mir - it's the name of the space station and it means both peace and the world.  The a means of peace or of the world.  Prospekt is street.  So it's the street of peace, or the street of the world.] and then took some of Ст. Larson's parent's bags to the same apartment for storage until Friday.  Then we had lunch on Ст. Larson and came home, Ст. Larsen is & was with us.

Then we went over to Алисия & Жаром's [Alicia & Jarom's].  All of the investigators were there except Virginia & Eric.  It was pretty good, but we weren't expecting food so at first we were kind of disappointed, but it went pretty well.

Okay right here I'm going to rag on Ст. Larsen.  Today is not my favorite day.  Never mind.  He's just not the kind of guy that has any tact.  Okay that's as much as I'm going to rag on him.

I also received a letter from Sister Brown who lives in Greece.  She is serving a mission there.  She's pretty good looking and I wasn't sure if I would get a letter back from her or not.  That is pretty dang cool, so I was pretty excited.  We have Ст. Larsen & Howes, an elder who is going home in 3 days.  We played poker and Ст. Howes won all.  That sucks for me.  But oh well.  night

[Missionary Weekly Planner - up above I mentioned all the investigators from Alicia & Jarom's apartment building were over there except for a couple.  So I looked up the weekly blue planner to see who all we had written down, on the backside.  So for March 16 - Mar 22 we have...

These were all Africans from Zaire/Congo that lived in the dorm-like building.  Except Pierre - he was married to Tatyana
Алисия и Жаром -  Alicia & Jarom
Эрик - Eric
Арели - Areily
Пьер - Pierre
Малу - Malout

Virginia is one of the Africans but she had just been baptized, so we would have the new member discussions.
Вержения - Virginia

These were contacts that we would try to set up discussions with.
Алла - Alla
Валери - Valeri

These were less active members that we went and worked with.
Владим Басова - Vladim Basov
Давид Волов - David Volov
Юлия и Татьяна Волкова - Yulia & Tatyana Bolkova


I don't remember who this was, just on the list but not with anything written
Юри - Yuri

March 16, 1997 - Sunday

Today was church and we had institute after church.  night

[Post journal chat - Not much for today's post is there?  Evidently nothing really important happened.  So let's recap where I'm at on my mission.  I've been in Russia 4 months and a couple of days (6 months on the mission).  Ст. Woolverton is my 2nd companion in the field (4th overall).  I'm serving in my 2nd apartment, and I'm still serving in my 1st branch. 

Up until now I haven't been too active in the mission field - partly because of that my Russian hasn't progressed very far either.  Well that will soon change - within a week or so are the next transfers and I'm going to get a new companion, Ст. Dennis Gammon from Vineyard, UT.  It's pretty close to the Provo area (I think).

I don't like change either now or then, so I'm not really excited to start working hard.  Well - we'll see how it goes.]

March 10, 1997 - Monday

Today we didn't do anything until about 3pm.  Then we went and dropped off some mail, bout Zuko for Семеный Вечер [Family Home Evening], and then went to FHE.  It was excellent.  We had a lesson by Ст. Blackwelder and then we went and ate some stuff.  We had a lot of белины and Zuko.  We had about 42 there and compared to last time that is about 4 or 5 times as much.  Last time it was the missionaries and 3 members.  This time it was очен [much] better.  Night

[post journal entry chat - I just love it that I'm a little confused about both English and Russian at this time in my mission.  Not close to being fluent in either.  I hi-lighted and bolded in blue the words that I misspelled in my journal.  I assume that I meant "bought" some Zuko.  I don't think I was talking "'bout" some Zuko.  The other two words in Russian are a little bit more understandable.  Блины are the Russian equivalent of crepes.  Usually they are a little bit more greasy, but they are so goooooooooooo!  Очень has the little ь - called a (soft sign).  The miyaki znahk, believe it or not, softens the ending of the word.  Both mistakes are probably pretty common.  The one that bugs me the most is the "bout."  The rewiring of my brain for Russian is causing some short circuits in my English.]

March 2, 1997 - Sunday

Well today is also weird - well not weird - just a little slow.  We had church, came home and ate some more borscht [борщ] that Ст. Woolverton made.  Its really good.  We also had some melted cheese sandwiches.  Then we planned for a half an hour or so and Ст. Larsen called.  So we went up there and he [Larsen] cut our hair.  On the sides mine is pretty short. 

While I was there I was talking to Ст. Larson, notice the o, about surfing.  I asked him if he knew any professional surfers.  He said who and I asked him about Joel Fisher.  He served a mission in Boise, Idaho and was in our ward for a while.  I told him a couple of stories about him and he said he used to be in his ward and they surfed at the same places. 

Now we are back at the house chilling.  And I'm watching "the Rain Man."  I'll have to go now to watch it.

[Post journal chat - Larsen & Larson had been companions the same amount of time that Woolverton & I had been.  Larsen was from UT (I think) and he was companions with Woolverton when Ст. Barnes & I tracted them out on my first full day in Russia.  Larson was from Cali and had been companions with Ст. Paige while I was with my trainer.

When Larsen was cutting my hair he would get to the cowlick at the back of my head and it wouldn't be to his liking so he would cut it shorter.  Then he would have to cut the rest of the sides to be the same shortness.  Then he would go back to the cowlick and cut it shorter again.  He did this a couple of times and I wanted to stop him after the first time.  That's why I mentioned in my journal that "On the sides mine is pretty short." 

This was back before missionaries had to have a discernible part in their hair - so it was dang, dang, short!!  The only other time that I had a really short hair cut was when I had about 2 1/2 months left in my mission, and I buzzed it.  3 weeks after that I had my interview with the President and he said I had a nice short haircut.  I said thanks, and told him that I got it cut 3 weeks ago.  Yeah...he didn't like it that much.

Now let's talk about borscht [борщ].  This was probably one of my earliest times eating it, most probably my first time helping make it.  All through my mission I loved to make and eat it.  In Russian борщ is just so much shorter than in English...here is why.  бор is bor.  A ш has the sh sound, but notice that борщ has a щ.  Its a ш with a tail.  The tail gives it a little shch in stead of the sh sound.]

February 21, 1997 - Friday

Wow next week is March.  About a month more and I will be with a different comp.  Maybe in a different branch.  Who knows.  We are having pork chops tonight.  Mmhmm mmhhmm gooooooooooood!! [I really wrote that many m's h's & o's.]  Ст. Woolverton makes really good pork chops.  I make pretty dang good gravy I might add.  And some pretty tasty mash potatoes.  Well I'll write later.  We have to go talk to the president of the Branch about some stuff.  later dude.

[Post journal chat - I still remember the first time that I had pork chops on my mission.  It was the first time that I saw someone making gravy.  Dang it was goooooood.  It was at a big lunch after church on one Sunday.  I remember Ст. Johnson was the one that showed me how he was making the gravy with some rue.

At this time in my mission I've been mentioning picking up the mail and working with the Branch President.  I think that Ст. Woolverton was the District leader.  I would go to the office to pick up mail when I was with Ст. Barnes as well, but that was just because Ст. Barnes liked to travel.  We used to go across town to do service.  By "across town" I mean all the way across Moscow.

Metro stops were about 3 minutes apart.  Between where our apartment was and service, it was 18 metro stops with two line changes.  So it was easily over an hour of just travel time for us to get to the school where we did our service...which was just an hour long.  Then it was an hour travel back.  So we often would stop by the office to pick up stuff.]

January 30, 1997 - Thursday

Ст. Parks called this morning wanting to know if Ст. Aldredge [the Ст. that went down to Voronezh when I first got in Moscow] had left a black "Grammar and Illustrations" book.  I said that I'd look for one and if I found one I'd send it down.  I don't think there is one around, but I'll look.  I got up at 9:30am.  That's when he called so I had to.  He's in Nizhny [Novgorod] and he had me call him back because his phone really sucks there for some reason.

[Post journal chat - It was pretty weird to hear from Ст. Parks again.  It was out of nowhere.  I never did find that book in that apartment, but later in my mission I did get my hands on one, and I kept it.

Nizhny Novgorod (Нижный Новгород) means "Lower New City."  One of the first big cities of the Rus was called Novgorod or new city, and this one is lower/further south than the original.  At least it's not called New New City.  Who knows where it would stop then?]

January 25, 1997 - Saturday

Today was pretty cool.  We went and played "Capture the Flag" in this old castle.  It was a castle partly built by Catherine the Great.  It is older than the U.S.A.  Then we came home, showered and then went to Arbotskaya and had some dinner.  Cool.  bye

[Post-Journal Chat - Царицино (Tsaritsina) was 400 years old.  It was situated in between two metro stations Царицино & Орехого (Aryekhova), being closer to Царицино.  Царь (Tsar) and Царина (Tsarina) are the names for the Russian Emperors & Empresses.  So that would be where the castle gets it's name.]

January 5, 1997 - Sunday

Today is a "working" day for the Russians because they got off for New Years Day.  So Church isn't until 7pm.  We are having a big dinner tonight because Ст. Moyle is flying out tomorrow.  Ст. Barnes is going to the Petrovsky Branch today.  We've been lazing around all day.  It's about 4:15pm and we just played a tie breaker chess match today. 

I suck, last night I kept running chess through my mind.  I was dog tired, because I'm sick, but I couldn't get to sleep.  I had my problem and finally got to sleep.  I can't tell if Satan is putting these little things in the way of my sleep or if I am just making excuses so I can sin.  Either way I'm a punk. 

I just don't feel like doing anything.  I don't even want to read, write or do arithmetic.  I'm silly I tell ya.  I wonder what Gilbert is up to?  I have a feeling that he is working a lot harder than I am over there in the land of baptisms.  I don't know if I will work any harder in my next companionship or not.  It all comes down to the fact that I like to sin.  I like to take it easy.  I have been.  I haven't been studying hardly at all this whole companionship.  I'm incredibly stupid. 

Today though, I made some flashcards or whatever you want to call them.  So I'll study a little on the metros.  I need to cut out playing chess, reading newspapers or a lot of books and sleeping in and of course my problem, and I'll do a lot better.  Then I need to do things like study regularly, not give in to borderline wrong things and clean up a lot more.

[Post Journal Chat - Looking back on this post I can see that I'm being extremely hard on myself, was depressed and homesick.  I'm not trying to blame Ст. Barnes, but it's hard when you come in all charged up and ready to go, and the first two months have these kind of stuff in it. 

I remember the first morning when I woke up at 6:30am and wondered when my comp was going to get up.  At 6:45, or maybe closer to 7am I went and woke him up.  "Hey Ст. Barnes time to get up" and I turned the light on, and then went back into the living room.  He might have turned it off, or just slept through it.  He didn't get up until 8 or 9. 

A couple of morning like that and you stop trying to wake your senior comp at 6:30am.  Then you, yourself, stop getting up on time.  It's easy to see how it all snowballs huh? - well bye]

December 12, 1996 - Thursday

Okay what's up G?  Today I slept in until like 11:00am and we didn't get out of the apartment until about 2:30pm or so.  Tomorrow I promise myself that I will get up by 6:30alm.  I promise.  I also will be good. 

We had a D with a Korean girl who spoke English.  I went off on something about Joseph Smith and it went bad, but the D was pretty good.  She was really apprehensive about the whole thing.  I'm tired of not feeling the Spirit [like in the MTC].  Night.

Oh yeah we went to another Hockey Game on the 10th and then the 11th, Wednesday, we played GatorBall.  I am so tired and sore.  Then we went out to eat at Santa Fe.  Good food but expensive.  Ст. Kirkwood was going to Воронеж (Voronezh) that night and so it was kind of a good-bye party.  Night.

[Post Journal Chat - Again for Culture Night we went to a Hockey Game.  ЦСКА [Tsey Ess Kah] played Братислава (Словакия) [Bratislava (Slovakia).  I really don't remember who won, but it was very fun to watch.]

December 2, 1996 - Monday

Yesterday was Elder Barnes' birthday.  After church we went out to eat at "American Bar & Grill."  I had the Spirit up until then.  Yesterday was Sunday by the way.  I had my problem as well.  I hate myself, but I'll do better.

[Post Journal Chat - Junior companions have to follow where their Seniors lead.  I wasn't really happy about going to the restaurant on Sunday, but I did eat when we were there.  It was the first American food I'd had in 2 weeks, and it was GOOD.  I can still remember what I ate.  It was a Mushroom Swiss Burger with a Dr. Pepper.  One irritating thing about Russian restaurants.  They do NOT give you free refills.  Not even one.  It was a good thing that I had plenty of extra money still.]

November 26, 1996 - Tuesday

Last night we went to FHE. It was fun. It was a district [meaning Moscow wide] thing so there was a lot of people there. We ate and I don’t [think that] my turkey was quite done. I hope I don’t get some sickness from it or a tape worm or something. Then they all shared (or three of them shared) thoughts about Thanksgiving. Then we came home. Elder Dent was there and I told him my mom was going to call and ask his mom if she could send some stuff over. He said great.

[Remember that for a region that doesn't yet have stakes - the word district has two meanings.  For Mission organization it refers to an area that several companionships are in, or just the group of missionaries themselves.  Most districts that I were in had between 6 and 10 missionaries.  Districts in Church organization can be replaced with Stake, just like Branches replaced Wards.] 

[After talking about a problem I was having]
In “Jesus the Christ” it talks about how some devils only come out through fasting and prayer and it is logical that some sins only come out through fasting and prayer. Besides fasting is one of the only ways I will feel good about myself.

9:33pm Today we didn’t have a district meeting because Elder Pabst – a German Elder – got lost on the way there.

[Post Journal Chat – In Russian a lot of the different countries sound almost the same as in English.

Japan – Yapon,
Germany – Germaniya,
Russia – Rossiya.

And most of the language names go along with what the country is – just ending in …ski.
English – Angliskii,
Yaponskii,
Ruskii….but Germany is not Germanskii. It is Nemyetskii – a Nyemets is a mute/deaf person. Evidently German speaking foreigners were one of the first nationalities that Russians got to know and couldn’t understand them. That’s like saying that Mexicans speak foreignese or deaffish.
Sorry – but I find that hilarious.]

11-15-96? 11-15-96? 11-15-96? - Friday

I'm weird I know it.  Well another day.  I have a big headache but hopefully it will go away.  I'll write you later and tell you what I did today.

It's 9:51pm.  Today we didn't do much.  But it was really exciting.  We went and bought some blankets etc.  Then came home and ate.  I was so tired that I fell asleep because we were going signboarding and that fell through, so my companion said I could take a nap.

I woke up at a quarter to 6 and we went tracking [it's actually called tracting (going door to door with a tract or pamphlet) - but it's my first exposure to it - so understandable that I would misspell it.]  We went way over onto another metro line and took a long bus.  We went to the top floor of a building and started tracking.  Elder Barnes did the first few doors and then I did the 3rd door. 

They [the inhabitants of the apartment] came to the door speaking English and so when they opened I spoke in English.  We talked to them for a minute and one of the guys, there were two guys in the apartment, kept asking if we had ever been robbed.  They invited us in and we talked about the Book of Mormon, and then we talked for a little bit.  The one guy kept asking us if we had ever been robbed.  He said it about 5 or 6 times, and finally Elder Barnes asked what he was getting at.  He pulled a gun underneath his pillow and demanded Elder Barnes' watch ["I'm getting at this" he said as he pulled the gun out.] 

Elder Barnes said it was time to go and walked to the door [to the room we were in] and out before one of the guys closed the door [right as I was trying to get through it - I was stuck in there with him].  He opened the door and went out but locked the front [door].  He didn't bring the gun with him though.  Then Elder Barnes ran back in the room and one guy that had pulled out the gun went in and closed the door. 

Then Elder Barnes came back out of the room WITH THE GUN [waving it around and telling them to get back].  In the meantime I had the other guy unlock the door.  I grabbed both our shoes and we ran down the stairs and went down the stairs [??] and we put our shoes back on.  [Elder Barnes could just stick his feet in his shoes like nothing...wiggle a bit and boom he had them on.  I had to unlace them and re-tie. I was still retying when]  Elder Barnes said something like "that makes me mad" and he went back up the stairs. 

I said "Whoa, whoa" and followed him up.  He like rang the door and said "Open the fetching door [you fetchers]"  and they did and then.....

They all started LAUGHING and I got that it was a joke.  So we laughed and talked for a while.

Just now Elder Barnes said that people think America is so much better.  They will move there.  Actually I put that to the question and he said you'd be surprised.  This is not even as good as America -  I said "I don't think America is so much better" and he said that "when you get my age on a mission you'll feel differently".  It was funny.

[Post journal chat - the really ironic thing about this hazing was the fact that several things about the hazing should have tipped me off.  Ст. Eric Larsen & Ст. Marcus Woolverton (who had pulled the gun) had thought it was going to be later and weren't expecting us.  So that's why they were speaking English.  As we walked in there was the picture of Christ appearing in the skies on the far side of the apartment.  Both missionaries were wearing shorts and so as we sat on beds opposite each other I thought that I saw garments underneath their shorts.  They must have noticed me looking though, because they immediately asked me another question and pulled their shorts down. 

Ст. Larsen was the one by the front door that opened it for me when Ст. Barnes was in the room.  He was trying not to laugh and he said that he wished that he could have taken a picture of my face when Ст. Barnes came out with the gun.  He said my eyes were so huge. 

Two days later at church on Sunday it was hard for me to trust those two, especially Ст. Woolverton.  He actually was next companion two months later.  Ст. Woolverton is really a nice guy and I had a lot of fun with him during our companionship.]

November 14, 1996 - Thursday

It's 12:43 at night.  I've just completed my first day in Russia - plus I've been awake for 34 hours.  Okay what do I think of Russia?  I feel a love for the people but I can't express myself yet so I can't help the people & show them how I love them.  I went on quite a long taxi ride - a long metro ride and I met my first Russian members.  They're not in my branch but I will probably see them again.

When we first got here at 2:15 - which was 24hrs & 15 minutes from when we woke up [in the MTC to get ready].  We went into the last half of a mission conference with L. Tom Perry.  It was cool.  I got to go up and shake his hand [at the end of the conference], because he had already shaken everybody else's hand.  I met my companion, Elder Barnes.  He's cool & just about to go home.  So I'm going to bed because I've not had much sleep.  night

[Post journal chat - I'd like to share our trip through the airport.  Us four Elders got off the plane and followed the rest of the crowd down a hall and into the customs area.  We were standing in one of the lines when we noticed a gal holding a sign that read "Herrick, Parks +2"  Now my first thought was "This lady is from the Mission Home?"

 Let me tell you why.  Here I was straight from the MTC - 2 months of NO TV, NO newspapers, NO nothing...and here there was this pretty (OK she was HOT) girl and her skirt was the shortest that I have ever seen in my life up to that point.  The test in our school was if you put your arms down to your side the skirt had to go past your fingers.  Her skirt was almost covered by her jacket - it probably didn't even reach past her wrists. 

Okay - so we moved up closer and said that we were Herrick & Parks etc. - it was pretty cool because the lady took us up to the front of the line.  For a minute Parks thought that he had lost his passport, but he found it and we all got stamped and then we bypassed customs with our bags and Boom - we were done and putting our stuff in the van that the mission driver had parked right outside the front doors.]

November 12, 1996 - Tuesday

Well I'm packing right now.  So I'll see you in a little while.  The only thing that I am worried about is getting my stuff in the bags.  Wow.  Well bye for now.

[Post journal chat - when I packed for the MTC I used a vacuum to suck the air out of stuff so that everything would fit.  Then when I opened some of the stuff in the MTC - it didn't fit in the suitcases anymore.  Later on my mission it seemed to fit less and less because I also picked up more stuff.]

November 6, 1996 - Wednesday

Well I took a shower last night and I had a really good sleep.  I wasn't sore or anything this morning.  Today is my last Wednesday at the MTC.  Elder Kindred said it's pretty sad huh? (when I said that outloud).  And I said what he said its pretty sad that we don't feel sad leaving the MTC.  I want to be in Russia right now.  I'll write later.

It's after we had a chance to teach the discussions again.  I feel like crap so much.  I feel like I have just procrastinated.  I just feel so terribles [yeah - no idea where I was going with that spelling].  I wish I knew why.  Jesus was perfect.  Why can't I be.  I hate myself.  This is what I wrote right after we finished teaching..."I've never really been tested.  I've felt so much more bad feelings deep inside as I started working hard.  I'm falling hard." 

Here is a quote that Sister Jensen relayed..."What kind of Church would this be if all missionaries were like me?"  You can probably guess how I felt.

[Post Journal Chat - Looking back I still can't understand how I could feel such contrasting feelings within 24 hours.  Tuesdays were always terrific because of the General Authorities' talks and here it is Wednesday and these feelings pop up.  I think that it comes from comparing myself to others.  I compare their best - with my worst.  For some reason that doesn't bring happiness???] 

October 2, 1996 - Saturday

Today has been awesome.  Ct Parks and I finally sat down and talked about some of the problems we were having.  I feel awesome.  Then I finished writing more notes and I gave them to Sister Heaton so that she could write them.  Brother Feldman, a sub, will write them in his handwriting to confuse everyone.  I hope that Ct Parks doesn't catch on because he was waiting for me to finish [the interview].

[Post journal chat - just mentioning the sub triggered a memory and I wasn't sure that I had put it down in here.  One time we were out doing a lesson on the stairs.  Calling on the phone was mentioned and B Wolsey was demonstrating a how a phone call would go & one of us missionaries was practicing with him.  Another teacher was passing and said that wasn't right.  As the pair started again to do a phone call - the other teacher imitated a crackling phone line - and then in an old babushka's voice, in Russian, he started to try to break into the conversation..."Natalya - is that you...who is on here..get off the line" and we all started laughing.

It was a funny anecdote, but I didn't really understand it fully until I was in my 2nd apartment.  Much of what we learned in the MTC didn't make sense out in the field.  But some did...our line was crossed with someone else's, probably our neighbors, and only one of us could be on it at a time.  Sometimes the phone calls went exactly like it had in the MTC.  It only happened once in a while, but by the time my 6 months was up it got a little tiring.  Once we really needed to call and we had to make annoying noises until they hung up and we could use the phone.